Accomplishment Coaching

One of the guys in my Thursday morning men’s group asked the following question today:

“What will be different for you in 2010?”

I immediately became present to the difference this group has made for me – what a gift it has truly been.  For the past 18 months, I’ve been showing up every Thursday morning to explore my relationships, my faith and myself.  Our weekly conversations always invite me to make a difference rather than just accomplish something.

The New Year is a common time of reflection and promise for accomplishment.  Did you reach your goal(s) for 2009?  What do you want to accomplish for 2010?  As customary this process is, perhaps what’s more familiar is realizing the majority of us don’t reach many of our goals.

So what if following this habitual process strategizing accomplishment was actually the thing holding you back?  What if focusing on what you want to accomplish is actually the Achilles Heel you’re fervently seeking to overcome?

What if this year, rather than asking “what do I want to accomplish”, you ask “what difference will I make?”

What difference will you make if you:

• Took more risk?
• Embrace dangerous authenticity?
• Refuse to stop when confronted with obstacles?
• Create a deliberate and intimate relationship with God / Spirit?
• Forgive those who have caused you pain?
• Give up your insistence in looking good and got messy?
• Give up being separate, right and alone in exchange for creating relationships that make a difference?
• Replace 50% of your busy-ness with reading, walking, laughing, or just sitting still?

Consider taking some of these on.  2010 will be a new year of possibility, relationship and connection.  It will be a year of you making a difference.

Are you willing to accept you actually can and do make a difference?

What a gift that will be to us all.

Happy New Year,

- Coach Preston

Notice is guaranteed

Expert marketer (and dare I say philosopher), Seth Godin, offered one of the most powerful ideas I’ve heard in years:

“The reason they want you to join them is, that once you do, then they can ignore you.”

How frequently do we want to fit in?  Isn’t that the lifeblood of most all communities?  So what could Seth Godin mean?

Perhaps leadership is what he’s inviting us to consider.

Leadership means:

• Being different when all others want you to be just like them
• Being outrageous when all others want to be safe
• Being loud when all others want to be quiet
• Being creative when all others choose to react
• Being responsible when all others prefer the familiarity of victimization
• Being on the margin when all others race for the middle

Communities, businesses, families and organizations require us to join them so they can thrive.  But joining them doesn’t have to mean subscribing to “sheepdom”.  Be willing to bring your crazy ideas, your over-the-top energy, your unrelenting pursuit of integrity, and your quest for excellence.

Leadership Practices:

1. Notice where you complain and don’t act in your business, family or community
2. Make a list of 20 things you’d like to change in your business or life
3. Starting today, make one of those changes – then make one change per day for the next 20 days
4. Practice asking “For what?” about and in all meetings and conversations – (Is the meeting and conversation truly in service to what you’re trying to create?)
5. Practice embracing and having compassion for criticism, upset and funny looks – avoiding those means you’ve moved to the middle
6. Make a list of your three favorite leaders and ask “What status quo are they unwilling to join?”

A bumper sticker on a neighbor’s car reads, “Women who behave will never make history.”

I love it.

Happy Attention-getting,

- Coach Preston

One of the founders of the coaching industry, Thomas Leonard, came up with a list of 546 goals to keep us focused and evolving.  I wanted to share one of my favorites:

Goal No 29 – Start reading the books that will help you evolve instead of merely develop.

I’ve not shared much about the books I read and the impact they have on me – shame on me.  Perhaps one or several will make an impact on you as well.

Here are several in no particular order:

• Immunity to Change – A bright, new perspective on the idea of Context, the lens through which we see the world.  Our immunity system (physiologically speaking) is a powerful deterrent to nasty stuff.  It can also be a deterrent to the things that are good for us as well.  Not only do authors, Kegan and Lahey, offer powerful case studies, they walk you through a simple exercise to open up our immunity systems to what we do want to let in.

• Rediscovering Catholicism – You DO NOT have to be a Catholic to appreciate this book.  Matthew Kelly is one of my all-time favorite authors (Rhythm of Life is another winner).  Rediscovering Catholicism takes you on a journey of faith, exploration, and responsibility that any leader must practice.  Whatever “church” you subscribe to, a key message is that you as a leader must take the church to the people rather than demand they come to the church.

• The Last Word on Power – This is the BEST book on the concept of Context and Reinvention.  Author Tracy Goss walks with you on a journey in discovering your winning strategy, understanding your ultimate limitation as a human being, putting everything at risk, playing an impossible game and more.  This should be required reading for anyone older than 18.

• A Year with Rumi: Daily Readings – If you don’t know who Rumi is, you’re missing out.  This dude rocks – period.  Although I grew up saying “I just don’t do poetry”, Rumi has invited me to turn 180 degrees.  Coleman Barks has done a magnificent job in translating Rumi’s works to daily readings that will make an enormous difference in your life.

• The Bible (NRSV or NLT Version) – This is the ultimate leadership manual.  I have both my Catholic version as well as a life application version.  One keeps me connected to my faith translation and the other keeps me connected to using the messages of the Bible in my daily life.  I recommend investing in at least one, leather-bound Bible – don’t skimp and buy the cheap versions.

The list will go on. 

Please email me at preston@prestontrue.com with other book suggestions on leadership, faith and discovery.

Happy Evolutionary Reading,

-Coach Preston

The power of more

Partnerships are a funny thing.  We seem to love creating them, but it often seems we have real struggles sticking with them.  So what gives?

Rarely intentional, we enter personal and professional relationships without truly considering what’s important for each one of us.  The Gallup Management Journal ran an article last year that identified the three “most important statements in determining how well your abilities mesh with those of your collaborator”:

1. We compliment each other’s strengths
2. We need each other to get the job done
3. He or she does some things much better than I do, and I do some things much better than he or she does

Although this can apply to personal partnerships as well, I wanted to give an example of how this so critically applies to professional partnerships.  Let’s use our old friend, Stan, as an example.

What Stan knows about himself is the following:

He’s created a successful business over the past 12 years primarily because he’s great at fostering relationships, freely expressing compassion, mentoring and developing his staff, being highly self-aware, and upholding integrity. 

But he also realizes that he’s often too narrowly and short-term focused, jumps too quickly to fix symptoms rather than identifying the root problem, and lacks critical decisiveness in taking action.  This often puts him in a position of complying with the views of others and current circumstances.

When I asked Stan who he felt would be a good fit as a potential partner, he suggested he’d look for someone who has a high level of relationship building skills, sees a similar future for the business, and is willing to weather the bumps of partnership.

If we take a look at this more critically, Stan was really looking for someone who was very similar to himself.  Of course he would… he’s built a successful company on the culture he’s created.

But that’s exactly what Stan doesn’t need.

Rather I suggested he look for someone with the following characteristics:

• Willingness to speak powerfully and pointedly, even if he/she occasionally steps on some toes
• Has little interest in the symptoms of business challenges but can see the root-causes
• Maintains daily focus on the five, ten and fifteen year future of the business
• Has a focus and drive for business results and keeps individuals and teams accountable for results
• Regularly displays courageous behavior in making decisions and taking action

At first Stan was completely resistant… “That person will get crushed in my company.”  Eventually, he began to see exactly why that type of partner would be best.  Through interviews with his staff in which he asked what they thought his leadership gaps were, they almost perfectly outlined the above description.

A year later, Stan and his partner Mary have grown the business significantly, hired more effective staff and shifted the company culture from being 100% “nice and friendly” to “nice and friendly AND results-oriented”.

Stan found a business partner who compliments his strengths, keeps him accountable to results, and is able to do what he can’t.  He does the same for Mary.

Powerful partnership is often most effective with clear difference rather than similarity.

Leadership Practices:

1. Schedule interviews with your staff over the next two weeks and ask the following questions:
   1. What do you see are my gaps in leadership?
   2. If you were going to partner me with another leader, what qualities would that leader possess?
   3. What two actions would you assign me to practice more effective leadership?
2. Write out the three top characteristics you bring to the table as a business leader
3. Notice how many times your actions say “I can do this all on my own” – what are the results?
4. Publicly share your gaps with at least two people, and especially with your current business partner

The myth of “individualism” died long ago, but there’s a large contingent of business owners who still buy into it.  If you’re ready for a new level of success, I invite you to consider a partnership or, if already in one, revisit it.

If you (and your partner) are interested in discovering exactly what you do and don’t bring to the table, please contact me to take my Leadership Circle profile.  I’ve found no better profile to support effective partnership development.

Happy Cahoots,

- Coach Preston

Where do you stop?

WARNING: This post is a call to action, not a warm and fuzzy.  Read at own risk.

 

Yet again, MSNBC has done a wonderful job in capturing our attention by leveraging that powerful little human emotion called fear… “Older job seekers struggling with age barrier“.

As much as I cringe at what I imagine to be sensationalism, perhaps there is some truth to the story. 

Many folks find themselves out of work these days.  It’s frustrating, exhausting and often depressing.  It seems as though there’s a shrinking inventory of available opportunities as well.  Is there really a light at the end of this tunnel?

Yes there is, but it’s surely not being created by employers.

You see, an article like the MSNBC one paints a picture of employers being the bad guys.  Age, race, religion and gender are just the beginning of possible discrimination.  And, yes it does happen unfortunately.

However, I invite all of us to look at not just the content of this story, but most importantly at the CONTEXT of this story. 

For me, the context is about job seekers being at the effect of circumstances – i.e. age, race, gender, experience, current economy, industry, etc.  Yet, I see a myriad of job postings on the career websites I frequent, talk to many HR folks who say “I’m struggling to fill this open position”, and hear many stories of people finding employment.  So what gives?

Consider that in any situation, context is NOT the truth, but a possible interpretation.

So what if we really took that sentence to heart?  Now what?

Here’s what I mean…

The economy is challenging right now, not just in Detroit, but across the nation.  Finding a job is more complex and requires more time than it used to.  Fear is the most common emotion we experience these days.  But I have one question for you…

Is that where you stop?

Because if you stop, especially in this economy, you’re screwed.  If you stop because you feel that age, gender, race, money, industry, economy or geography is an issue, you will NOT find employment.  What you will do is spend the majority of your time blaming others for your woes.

This applies to me and the rest of the self-employed as well.  None of us can afford to stop now.  Sure, we’ve got about as many external circumstances as we could ever want as evidence to stop, but that will not do.

For those who have found new employment, new clients, new projects and new money have simply not stopped.  They keep going every day, creating the next opportunity, having the next conversation, scheduling the next meeting, reading the next book.  They don’t stop.

Leadership Practices:

In service of building your muscles around not stopping, please answer these questions and consider these actions…

1. What’s that uncomfortable place you just won’t go?
2. By not going there, what story about you is kept in place?
3. Based on that story, what are you really committed to?
4. Write a letter to yourself two years from now, reflecting back on the past two years.  What will your “two years ahead” self be telling your “today” self?
5. What five people will you call today to generate a conversation about possibility?  Do it again tomorrow.  Then again, and again, and again.
6. Create a structure for support to keep you empowered and in action such as our career coaching program.

Your next opportunity may arrive in your lap by surprise, but only after you’ve taken the action to create the circumstances that would have it happen.

Happy Action,

- Coach Preston